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Twilight Time（第1页）

TwilightTime

黄昏时分

ReflexivelyIreachedtoturnonmycarradio，presettoKGBX，thesoft-roIalwayslistentoonmyearly-mdrivestomyjobatthepostoffiIglamy14-year-olddaughterinthepassehoughtIhadbetterturnoffit。

Lizworeadress。Thatinitselfbespokedtheseriousheo。Wewereonourwaytfield，Missouri，districtwidemusipetition，whereLizwouldbeplayingaflutesolo，herveryfirst。Iknewfrommyowiondaysbaesotathatitmessedwithyourtrationtohearanymusicbesidesthepieceyouwereplanningtoplay。

“Dadsaidhemighte，”Lizsaid。Herfatherhadn’tbeenabigpartofherlifesinceourdivorce10yearsearlier，andshesouhexdscared。

Ou，didIknowthatfeeling--wantingtoimpressyourfatheraime，beingterrifiedoflettinghimdown?SuddenlyIwas12yearsoldagain，sittiheMiemusipetition，fingerspoisedonthekeyboardofmyshinyblaItaliaa。Ilookedoutattheaudienceofproudparents。ThenIsawhim。Mydad。Hesatattheendofarow，armsfolded，crewcutbristling。Hispiergblueeyesnarrowedbehindhisblack-rimmedglassesandfowaveringlyonme。

Ipletelychoked。I’dpractitestpieonthsubyheart，i。Butmyfanightaswellhavebeenacardboardboxthatafternoosomesemblauageintears。

Noefrommyfather，aWorldWarIIveteraomizedauthority。Hedidn’tsayathitookthewheelofourstationwagon，hismouthagrimlioffonthe150-miledrivebacktoDuluth。Ididn’tsayaher。WhatcouldIsay，really，afterwhatI’ddone?IknewhowhardDadworkedtetherenoughmoneyformyaandlessons。Buttheoimehewasabletopetitiohimdown。

&herwedrove，themorethesilenourstationwagoilitstoodlikearablewallbetweenDadaseemedanespeciallyishmentgmusiourdeepest。

BythetimeIg，thelastoffive，myfatherwaswornoutfromthedemandsalargefamily。MybrothersandsistersandItiptoedaroundhimwhenhehisshiftatJeno’sPizzafactory。ButonSundayafternoons，Dadwouldsitbahisredaskmetoplayforhim。HelovedthemusicoftheBigBandera，ahawilightTime。Itaughtmyselfthetuhesheetmusi。Itdiderthatmyrenditionwaslastyle。Myfatherwouldhumalong，hiseyesclosed，tearsestheersasifI’dtraosomemagical，heavenlyplace。

DadneversaidawordtheentirewayhainattendedoneofmypetitiooverthehurtofhavingdisappoiheonepersonI’dmostwaomakeproud。I’dlostmorethanmyposurethatafterasifI’dlostthekeytomyfather’sheart，andhediedbeforeIditagain。

Whydidyouletmefailmyfather?I’dofteoGodintheyearssin’tyouatleasthavegivenmeaakeituptohim?“Mom，thisisit。”Mydaughter’svoiappedmebacktothepresent。IparkeditralHigh。“Good，Ihavetimeto，”Lizsaidaswewalkedintotheschool。

Ii，Liztookherfluteoutofitsfoldedhermusithroughherpieceflawlessly。Justbeforewesteppedialhall，Igaveherahug。“Relax，”Isaid。“Ytodogreat。”

Lizlaughednervously。“Maybeyoushouldwaittillthepetition’soverbeforeyoudecidethat。”Oher，thesoloistsscheduledbeforeLizplayed。Theclockinouslyclosetoher11:05performaime。“Dad’shere，”Lizwhisperedtome。“Ihearhiminthehallway。”Herfathertroopedin，gavideocamera。IfeltaflutterofayforLiz。ThehingIknewshewasheseatandingstifflyohepiano。Mr。Hillme，hersocial-studiesteadapanist，>

&asbadasoests，isit?”Lizchuckled，thetensioneasingfromherfadliftedtheflutetoherlips。

Lord，pleaseletherplayherbest。

Liztookadeepbreathaohersersdahesilverkeys。Themelodyfloatedoutoftheiandpurea。Iyeyes，lettingmyselfbecarriedawaybymydaughter’ssong。

IfotaboutthepetitiotaboutLiz’sperfinfroher。

Allatouredmyoatientlyenduringmynightlyapractisthoughhemusthaveyearnedforpeadquietafterhislongdaysatthepizzafaypracticaldad，adamantlyopposedtoanyki，gtomakepaymentsonatop-of-the-line，full-sizeawhenI’doutgrownmysedstudeern，seriousdad，gupan，pigoutthenotesofaswingyBigBaingthewholehousejumping。Myual，overworkedfather?leaningbahisreer，hisburdenschasedawaybytearsofjhisyouchildplayhisfav。

Mydad，whomusthavefeltsoawfulknowinghispreseedmefromplayiagethathehadn’tknownwhattosayordotoe--excepttostayasetmeatmysubsequeions。Dad，I’mshtyouointedinme。Iknowyoulovedmeevehanyoulovedmusic。IwishyouuchIloveyoutoo。IwishIcouldplayTwilightTimefain。

Lizputdoweandtookabowtothunderousapplause（well，thuoaproudmother，anyway）。“Mom，Ididhemusic，”Lizexthethewayhome。“Imean，Iwaslookingatit，butIdidoreadit。Ijustplayedaakemeaway。”Ikshemeant。

MafterLiz’spetitioformy4:30A。M。shiftatthepostoffice。Iycarradio。SileeadofKGBX’ssoftrock，outofthespeakerscametheunmistakablebrassysoundsofa194bahisstation?

Awoman’ssmokytraltoedwordsI’dneverheardsung，thoughtheywereprihetatteredsheetmusimyoldacase。“Heavenlyshadesofnightarefalling，it’stwilighttime。Outofthemist，yourvoiceisg，it’stwilighttime。Whenpurple-coloredsmarktheendofdayI’llhearyou，mydear，attwilighttime。”